The other day, I went to Mayo to sign my lease and drop a few things in my new place. I can’t get over how big it is! My few pieces of furniture are going to look lost in all these rooms, haha.
And while I’m organising and packing and wheeling and dealing, I’m also becoming increasingly aware that these are my last few days in Bray. I’ll be back briefly next week, to clean up and hand back the keys, but by this time next week I’ll no longer have a home in Bray.
I’ll miss it. Much as I feel like I’m “going home” to the West, and much as my situation in Bray hasn’t suited me for the longest time – that’s the situation, the fact that I am a light sleeper and the walls are thin. It doesn’t change the fact that the people I rent from are lovely, and that Bray is beautiful. I love being so close to the sea, and I love my “stubborn rock” Bray Head, whose steadfast energy and unfathomable strength has nourished me so much over the past three years.
Yes, it was a good thing to come to Bray. I still drive home by the strand every afternoon, roll down the window and breathe in the fresh salty air, and marvel at the beauty of the sea and Bray Head. I’ll miss all that.
Living here was what I needed at the time. I had sorted out my finances, and these past few years were the crown on the “restoration program”: paying back the last of my dues and making savings for a possible deposit on my own place. I finished both, and I’m very glad and proud I did, but I’m also aware of the price I paid – many years of living skint and working in places that aren’t suited to my soul and my entire being, making myself go through it in order to reach my goals. It was definitely worth it, but the task is accomplished now and the compromises are no longer necessary.
It is time.
It is time to look ahead, to live again, to sleep again, to be surrounded by beauty, by my birds, and by my work. The internet in my new place is connected and works perfectly, so my survival is secured. I won’t have to compromise by leaving the house, unless something unforeseen happens. I am very, very grateful and at the same time, I know that I’ve worked so hard and gone through those last years to earn myself this next step to my own life.
On Saturday morning, my favourite movers (if you’re in Ireland and need to move, ask me and I’ll give you the contact. Best people ever!) and I will load all my stuff into a van and then drive the long way across the country. My budgies will be scared, but without drama queen Tia it’s going to be a lot easier. They’ll be fine.
Once arrived, I’ll place the birds into their new, peacefully quiet room and proceed to help unloading. I’ll have a beautiful living room with a sofa (which can be converted to a double bed – hint hint, my friends, come and visit me!), a huge kitchen, a garden, a small office, and FOUR bedrooms upstairs, of which one will be the room I read and game in next to the budgies, one I’ll sleep in, one will be for storage, and one… well, I don’t quite know yet.
After the weekend, I’ll go back to work the last few days in HP, and then I’m back to Mayo for good. For good and for better, and best. Wahoo!
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